We’re just wrapping up some of the best four days in a row that this family has had in awhile. Thanksgiving was a lovely day packed with two delicious meals and two fun family gatherings. We packed up Skyler and Bruno to head across town to Granny’s house in Belton. It was a full house, including Skyler’s four cousins, who kept her and Bruno entertained nonstop.
After the party dispersed at Granny’s, we headed back to Mission to my Aunt Vicki’s house, where she and John cooked up an amazing gourmet Thanksgiving feast. Skyler saw the plate of black and green olives and insisted on having some “grapes,” so we let her try one. If only we’d had the video camera. After several chews, her brow furrowed and lips puckered. You could see the wheel’s turning in her expression, that eventually this is going to be sweet and juicy. But it never got there, and with tears of frustration, she spit the chewed up olive out of her mouth and cried until we gave her enough to drink to wash the taste away. I feel the same way about olives!
On Black Friday, Ronnie had to work for a few hours, so Skyler and I took off for some shopping. No, we are not crazy! We didn’t venture out to the mayhem of the mall or other major holiday shopping centers. We hit up the likes of Aldi & Hy-Vee for some much needed grocery shopping, and then Hobby Lobby to get some Christmas decorations. Skyler was fascinated as we went up and down the aisles looking at all the Christmas decor, and I had to practice some serious restraint to not buy up all the stuff I wanted.
When we got home, we were so excited to setup the artificial tree Ronnie’s mom had given us, along with our new Christmas decorations, but after we got everything out, we realized the main pole was missing. Sure enough, it’s still in her garage, so hopefully we’ll get that this week!
That evening, my brother came over and we all went to dinner at Jose Pepper’s after getting craving for espinaca dip while watching Diner’s, Drive-In’s, and Dives. It was delicious and Skyler enjoyed playing with all the other little kids that were out with their families that night.
My brother’s girlfriend joined us at home later where we just visited and let Skyler entertain us. Since it was such a relaxing weekend I decided to let her stay up with us as long as she was happy and behaving, which turned out to be 1:30 in the morning! We finally decided to turn in, even while she was still going strong. The Saturday evening we were all up late again hanging out over at our friends Cory & Josh’s house, visiting with them and their 4 1/2 month old boy, Brooks. I should add that Skyler has been a total doll all weekend long and just a blast to be around. I haven’t even felt the need for a break from her!
Today we mostly got back in the groove, did laundry, cleaned, rearranged some things in the house to get ready for the week. However, today I decided to revive one of my own family’s holiday traditions that I remember happily from growing up. I got out the scissors and white paper, and we made snowflakes to put on the front window! Skyler is a bit young to make her own yet, but she loved watching me unfold my creations each time, and was very excited to see them go up on the window.
Tonight we’re winding down with our usual Sunday Jack’s Pizzas, and as I recap this wonderful weekend, I’m warm with excitement for the rest of this holiday season!
Holiday season is fast approaching, and we’re starting to gear up. First, I changed my blog theme. The old “springy” theme has lasted me almost two years, but I got tired of having to work with the set color scheme when designing headers, so I’ve chosen this neutral option. My current header is basic but works with the cold weather, and that purple is one of my favorite colors right now! When I’m feeling creative I’ll try to come up with something more personal like the previous header with photos in it.
Today Ronnie and I raked up the last of the fallen leaves in the yard for leaf pickup tomorrow. We also dug up our bulb plants to bring them inside for “hibernation.” It’s always exciting to dig them up because over the summer they multiply, so it’s kind of like Christmas in its own rite – free flowers!!! We planted two beautiful purple dahlia’s this year and came out with seven bulbs. And though we failed to bring in our dozens of canna lillies last winter, one lone survivor poked it’s leaves up this summer, so I dug it up and found three bulbs to plant next year!
I’ve also sort of begun Christmas shopping, though I haven’t actually ventured out to the stores. I was able to order some stuff online and get free shipping, so that was convenient! I also bought a few cute holiday gift bags at Target (in the $1 bins at the front), so I’m excited to start wrapping as soon as we have gifts to wrap.
And finally, Ronnie’s mom brought us her artificial Christmas tree, which is sitting in a plastic tub in the back room, itching to be setup. I’ve really wanted to do it the last week, but am practicing patience for the day after Thanksgiving. For some reason, Skyler knows what it is, points at the box almost daily saying “Kwistmas Twee!” We didn’t set one up last year, and she wasn’t even talking yet, so I don’t know how she picked this up already? Anyway, as much as she loves helping me do household things, I think she will really get a kick out of setting up the tree this year, so I’m really looking forward to next Friday!
This winter I’m going to really try to embrace it – the cold, the dark, the ugly, in all it’s glory. I’ve always been a spring and summer girl, but since that’s only half my life, I really need to make the most of the colder months and not wish them away. It may take a lot of red wine, warm blankies, and fresh baked chocolate chip cookies, but winter is not going to get me down this year!
Sometimes I find myself questioning everything, wondering what really matters, fearing things I can’t control. I wonder if I’ve always had these thoughts or if it’s something that comes with age and experience and life.
That brief moment I pass an accident on the highway and my mind lurches into what-if’s of all kinds, running the gammut of all my loved ones and how hard it would be to lose anyone tragically. And then I become thankful for every second and all that I’ve been given, and I beg and plead with God to keep us all safe and happy and healthy for a long life.
And then I see a a weathered elderly person at the store, with their tired, sad look, as they watch life around them change faster than their aged and less capable bodies can keep up. It looks scary and lonely, and I realize I never want to be old. How must it feel to watch your body begin to fail you, knowing it’s the natural way of life, but also going through it without your own mom and dad, maybe even without your spouse, who have all long passed and left you behind. Maybe you’ve got children and grandchildren and great-grandchildren, who are all busy living their active young lives. They used to depend on you for survival, and now you depend on them to help you through the rest of your days. I do believe we can stay “younger” physically and mentally if we live healthy and maintain a certain attitude, but eventually, there is a point of no return. And it scares me deeply.
Back in the here and now, things happen that test my foundations, my loyalties. I realize things and people aren’t always what they seem, sometimes better and sometimes worse, and sometimes just different. But it makes me stronger in who I am and what’s important to me. I think ahead again to my whithering future self, and I hope that when I’m remembering all that has come before, it is filled with joy and purpose, and nothing was wasted. Maybe then, it would be easier to say goodbye.
(For the record, I am not a fan of the Jordan Sparks pop song that has a similar name to the title of this post.)
It seems like our home these days is one big warzone, between Skyler and me. And by these days, I guess realistically it’s only been the last two or three days, but it FEELS like so much sufferingly longer than that in my head!
The ol’ Terrible Twos are apparently crashing down on us hard right now, and I really hope it doesn’t last as long as she is going to be “two,” because if so, I might just ship her off to her grandma’s until September 11th next year, and at that point we’ll negotiate a new contract if her attitude is not up to my standards. Grandma’s is the only place she wants to be anyways, what with the all out tearful tantrum that takes place when I pick her from there on Monday’s. And though it’s not quite as dramatic, I get a similar display of love when I go to pick her up from daycare each day after work. As soon as she sees me she runs away, whining “No! Noooo! Noooooo!” You would think we beat and tortured her at home or something.
And all the little things, like putting her shoes and coat on in the morning, listening to music in the car, or changing a diaper – she resists me with full force, thrashing and screaming in opposition to whatever it is I need her to do or not do. Even the things that she is trying to do herself, if they don’t go smoothly, or she drops something, or has trouble with any of her coordination efforts or skill, she reacts so impatiently and violently, I wonder where this is coming from?
It is an incredibly trying and irritating way to start and end my day. And to be honest, right now, my work is my haven, which is the opposite of the way things should be. But it’s a place where I’m in control, things usually go well, I’m surrounded by generally sane and capable people, and I have the support I need when conflict arises. The complete opposite of my life with a two-year-old.
I know a few people who are expecting their first little ones over the next few months, and I am so excited for them. And I’m jealous. Those seem like the good ol’ days; the surreal life with a newborn baby that isn’t trying to sabotage your every effort to keep them safe, healthy, and happy. But don’t get any ideas. Jealousy of people with newborns has nothing to do with baby fever. Because adorable little babies eventually become TWO YEAR OLD MONSTERS. And who knows what they turn into after THAT?!?!
(Skyler – if you are reading this someday, do know that I love you dearly and wouldn’t change this life for a second if it meant you weren’t in it. But do know you are severely close to ruining any chance that I’ll help sneak you out of the house when you are sixteen and want to go on that first date but your mean daddy won’t let you out of his site. Be good to your mommy, I can be a great asset to you later if you don’t burn all the bridges by the time you’re THREE.)
Sometimes I get caught up only writing about the significant things in our lives – major milestones, events, deep thoughts – that I forget to document some of the most wonderful things that come and go with Skyler. So here, I’m going to jot them down.
- Since she was sitting in a highchair, Skyler has always wiggled with delight anytime she eats something tasty. She will kick her legs rhythmically during an entire meal of something she enjoys. And if not in her highchair, for instance sharing a piece of chocolate or a cookie with one of us while we’re sitting on the couch, she’ll run around or jump up and down once she gets that tasty bite in her mouth. The way she enjoys good food makes me enjoy good food even more!
- Another food-related memory we like to call “the baby bird.” When she wants what we are eating, she just walks up with her face as close to the food as possible and her mouth wide open, big eyes staring at us. Waiting, patiently, expectantly, for a morsel to make it’s way in her mouth.
-Some kids suck their thumbs are play with the silky tag on a stuffed animal. Skyler plucks Pink Bear’s fur. Between two fingers she absent-mindedly pulls up on his fur, when she’s riding with him in the car, falling asleep, or even just walking by him on the floor, she’ll stop briefly to get a good pluck or two and the be on her way.
- She has been into blankies for awhile now. She found her flannel receiving blankets stacked in a drawer and now they are always out and about everywhere (there’s at least a dozen). She likes to spread them out flat on the floor, or cover up Pink Bear, Bruno, Mom, Dad, dolls, pillows, you name it. But she only likes to cover things up one blankie at a time. If she asks for help and you pile several blankies on at once, she gets upset and yells “One at a time!”
- Ever since she was recovering from her surgery she’s had protein shakes to drink on a regular basis. We all drink whey protein in this household, so the top of our fridge has bags & containers of different brands and flavors depending what’s on sale or if Ronnie’s clients gave him some they didn’t like (score!). Skyler now knows that’s where her “chocolate milk” comes from, and she’s particular on which bag even. Currently there’s a purple bag of protein with a colorful diagram on the back that she thinks looks like a beach ball, and a black bag with green on it. When she wants milk she’ll ask for either the “beach-a-ball one” or “gween one.” I don’t think she really knows the difference in taste, but it’s more which bag she likes the look of better at that time.
I’m sure there are many other little things I should be writing down, but that’s all I can think of at the moment. These are the things I’m going to need to dig down and remember fondly someday when she’s an introverted teenager that doesn’t talk to us!
Apparently, that is me. “The Nurturer” is the nickname for the ISFJ personality type (Introverted Sensing Feeling Judging), which is my result from taking the Myers-Briggs personality type test.
I’m not usually big on quizzes and tests, especially to describe my personality, but the Myers-Briggs stuff is at least consistent, and the written description of my ISFJ traits pretty accurately sums up a LOT about me. I’ve taken four or five different Myers-Briggs tests and EVERY time I get the exact same result: ISFJ, though borderline on the “F” to where I’m close to being an ISTJ (Thinking instead of Feeling). It’s almost creepy how all these different questions on different tests can yield the same result!
So here is what I like about my ISFJ self:
- “value harmony and cooperation”
- “constantly take in information about people and situations that is personally important to them, and store it away” Ronnie even teases me about my crazy detailed memory!
- “extremely dependable/strong sense of responsibility and duty”
- “great gift-giver”
And what I don’t like about myself:
- “ISFJ’s do not usually express their own feelings, keeping things inside. If they are negative feelings, they may build up inside the ISFJ until they turn into firm judgments against individuals which are difficult to unseed, once set.” Seriously? This is SO ME. How do they know me this well?
- “has a difficult time saying no when asked to do something, and may become over-burdened”
- “intensely dislike conflict”
Interesting stuff. Next up, I’m going to try and get Ronnie to take one of these tests. I’ve tried to guess what he might be, but I am stumped. I can’t even figure out if he’s an introvert or extrovert, which seems like it would be the most obvious. For now, I’m going to write my prediction for him: INTJ (Introvert, Intuition, Thinking, Judging)
Updated: Ronnie took the test and he is an……INTJ!!!!!!! OMG I’m so proud of myself for knowing my husband so well! And he’s a textbook case as well: INTJ: The Scientist.
Skyler: Skyler wide in car. Skyler bye-bye in car. Skyler bye-bye in car home.
Me: Yep, say “Bye-bye Darlene!”
Skyler: Bye Bye Daryeen! Bye bye Wowen (Owen). Wowen go home. Wowen go home.
Me: What about Owen’s sister Ella?
Skyler: Elya go home. Elya bye bye go home. Benben (Benjamin) go home. Jackon (Jackson) go home. Wywee (Riley) bye bye go home. Wywee go home.
Me: Did Sydney go home?
Skyler: Sinnee gone. Sinnee gone home. Sinnee bye bye home.
(a few moments pass)
Skyler: Mimmix (music) off. Mimmix OFF!!!
Me: You want me to turn the music off?
Skyler: Yaaaah. Mimmix off.
(a few moments of SILENCE as we go by a pasture)
Me: Look over there. Are the horses there?
Skyler: Horsees horsees horsees! Where da horsees? I see horsees. I see horsees. Where?
Me: It’s raining, they must’ve gone inside.
Skyler: Horsees inside. Its waineen. Horsees inside.
(silence till stoplight)
Skyler: I see car. I see car. Ky-ett (quiet?) car.
Me: Quiet car? Huh?
Skyler: Quiet car. Car seepeen.
Me: That car is sleeping?
Skyler: Yaaaah. Car seepeen.
Me: Hmm. Okay.
Skyler: Daddy seepeen. Daddy seepeen.
Me: Daddy was sleeping this morning? Yes, yes he was.
Skyler: Skyler seepeen. Daddy rockee. Daddy turn mimmix on.
Me: Yes, Last night Daddy rocked you with the music on and you fell asleep!
Skyler: Yaaaah.
(pause)
Skyler: I wan Daddy. Daddy hugs. Daddy hugs (I look in the rearview mirror and she’s hugging Pink Bear).
Me: Aw, yes you can give Daddy hugs when we get home.
Skyler: Daddy kisses. Daddy kisses (as she’s kissing Pink Bear on the nose).
Me: Yep! You can give Daddy hugs and kisses when we get home. He’ll be so happy to see you!
Skyler: Back home. Bye bye back home.
Me: We’re almost home!
Skyler: Back home!
…lagging behind. Haven’t downloaded photos in ages. Haven’t any thoughts worth posting about really. So here are a few random updates:
- Sad news: Super Pierce passed away last Friday. But he is in no more pain now and his family can begin the healing process.
- Worth noting: Swine Flu has made it’s way to our office. A coworker brought her 1 year old (who’s birthday is the same as Skyler’s!) with her to work last Friday and I was in a meeting with them, and then he started getting sick Saturday and she got the test results back today that it is H1N1. I’m pretty sure I didn’t touch him, and the incubation period from time of exposure should be up by now, so hopefully I’m in the clear! But hopefully she can get her little boy better while keeping herself from catching it and hopefully it didn’t spread to anyone else. And so cold/flu season is officially upon us at work.
- Speaking of work, I have my 3rd annual review tomorrow! I can’t believe I’ve been there three years already. And I still love my job!
- Skyler has a “new” word that I think is absolutely adorable. She calls strawberries “strawbeeberries” and she likes saying it and I crack up every time.
It’s hard to believe and explain how quickly Skyler is growing up. Her awareness, interaction, and vocabulary are exploding right now. And her personality…GEEZ her adorable, hilarious, obnoxious, headstrong personality! I see so much of her dad and myself in her unique little ways.
I’ve never seen a child as busy as she is. She builds the blocks up tall and knocks them down, cracking up hysterically when they scatter across the floor on impact, and then she does it again. And again. It cracks her up more and more each time. And lately she insists on my involvement. “Mommy pay bocks! Mommy pay bocks!” And if I don’t immediately stop what I’m doing to sit on the floor and play blocks with her, I am in TROUBLE! Whines, squeals, and a meltdown of disastrous proportions. So I’ve been playing a LOT of blocks lately!
I love her interpretations of language these days. Recently she was pointing at the floor next to her, and adamantly telling me what sounded like “Mommy, bayou! BAYOU!” I’m thinking where the heck does she get this word for the swamps in Louisiana?!?! We visited there while she was in my belly, but this makes no sense! It took me a few episodes of this conversation to realize she was trying to say “Mommy, sit by me! Sit by me!” But she hears me say so often “Want Mommy to come sit BY YOU?” Proper use of pronouns is so overrated!
We were also looking at a book recently, and there was an old looking camera, that she pointed to and said “Mimix!” which is her word for music. She must have thought it looked like the music box in her crib. I said “It’s actually a camera,” and from then on, when she sees that picture in the book, she points and says “Ashlee camma!”
She’s also perfecting her slang. When we ask her a question, she almost always answers with “Ummm…” while she thinks of the real answer. If she doesn’t know the answer she even looks like she’s thinking really hard and answers with “Ummm…?” And she’s moved on from answering “yes” when appropriate. Now she says “Yep!” or “Kay!”
Today at daycare I witnessed a side of her that I wondered if it existed. I was squatted down on the floor while she showed me a toy that she’s been especially infatuated with lately. Riley, who is a sweet little boy around 18 months, walked over next to me and started leaning in to me for what I thought might be a friendly kiss or hug. Skyler looked up and immediately shoved him away from me! He and I both were shocked! I scolded her to be nice, at which point she grabbed Pink Bear, and sternly told Pink Bear to “BE NICE!”
Finally, though I could go on and on about her antics these days, I’ll finish with this lovely note. She and I were playing around in my bed the other night, just the standard peekaboo and goofing around, when she stopped and turned to me rather seriously and out of the blue said “I wan baby brudder.”
!!!!!!!
